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"No man has a good enough memory to make a successful liar."
-Abraham Lincoln
"Better a witty fool than a foolish wit."
-William Shakespeare
If at first you don't succeed many will tell you why.
"Fashions are induced epidemics."
-George Benard Shaw
Cancer is the only true cure for smoking.
God helps those who help themselves.
A closed mouth gathers no feet.
"Show me a good loser and I'll show you an idiot."
-Leo Durocher
"It's dangerous to be right when the government is wrong."
-Voltaire
"Diplomacy is the art of saying " nice doggie" until you can find a
rock."
-Will Rogers
"Getting up before daybreak makes for health, wealth, and wisdom."
-Aristotle
"Marriage is neither heaven nor hell; it is simply purgatory."
-Abraham Lincoln
"To confess a fault freely is the next thing to being innocent of it."
-Pubilus Syrus
"Reason unites us, not with our contemporaries, but with people who
lived before us and with those who will live after us."
-Leo Tolstoy
Surely oppression maketh a wise man mad
-Ecclesiantates 7:7a
"Never put off until tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow."
-Mark Twain
"Martyrdom is the only way in which a man can become famous without
ability."
-George Benard Shaw
"In the end, everything is a gag."
-Charlie Chaplin
"Be careful of reading health books, you might die of a misprint."
-Mark Twain
We have just enough religion to make us hate, but not enough to make us love.
"Not everything's meant to be, and it's not always up to me."
-Lisa Loeb
"Wise men talk because the have something to say; fools talk because
they have to say something."
-Plato
"If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. Then give up.
No use being a damn fool about it.
-W.C. Fields
"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything."
-Mark Twain
"We learn from history that we do not learn from history."
-Georg Hegel
"Luck for rulers that men do not think."
-Hitler
"Religion is what keeps the poor from murdering the rich."
-Napoleon
"If the blind lead the blind, both shall fall into the ditch."
-Matthew 15:14
"You must learn to obey before you command."
-Solon
"When we talk to God, we're praying. When god talks to us, we're
schizophrenic."
-Lily Tomlin
Anything that is too awkward to be spoken is sung
"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step."
-Lao-Tze
"The whole worth of a kind deed lies in the love that inspires it."
-The Talmud
"There is no fortress so strong that money cannot take it."
-Cicero
"Many a small thing has been made large by the right kind of advertising."
-Mark Twain
"I tremble for my country when I reflect that God is just."
-Thomas Jefferson
"It is far harder to kill a phantom than a reality."
-Virginia Wolf
"Genius is one percent inspiration and ninety-nine percent persperation."
-Thomas Edison
"There are no facts, only Interpretations."
-Friedrich Nietsche
"It takes two to make peace."
-John F. Kennedy
"The absent are never without fault, nor the present without excuse."
-Benjamin Franklin
"Anger is never without a reason, but seldom with a good one."
-Benjamin Franklin